Archive for 08/02/2008

If the parents are being encouraged to bring the children to church with them eventually you will see that the need for children’s church is different. You will ONLY be meeting the needs of these children who truly need parental figures. You can reach out to THESE families in a bigger way. Filling the needs of maybe orphaned children or widows or single moms. which is what the bible commanded, not taking the place of parents!

 

It isn’t the churches fault oh NO it isn’t! It is the parents! SO EQUIP them! Encourage them! Change the focus! KUDDOS to bringing up this tough thing! It is near and dear to my heart! and something I believe God is reaching out and wanting to deal with ppl all over the world!

 

(thank you heather for posting this- if you want to read the whole comment it is under “family2”)

saturdays

Posted: 08/02/2008 in Uncategorized
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i love saturdays. i get help around the house all day- not just at night and we get to go shopping today! there’s a few things i want to get that i’ve been waiting weeks to get and today- i’m getting them… : ) i’m also excited to see lizzie pick out a new big girl toy… i know it’s not THAT big of a deal- but she is so proud of herself right now when she pulls herself up to standing and lets go for a few seconds and stands alone. lol too cute for words!! i know a “stand up” toy will help her develop and make her even more proud of herself!

can you believe this blog has had almost 7,000 views (not including my visits to my own site)!!! that’s unreal! and including my old glimpse at blogspot, i’ve had over 10,500 views since i started blogging in february… shwoo! it’s time to be relevant!!! 

i have a goal today to work on eric’s computer (our old pc laptop). i’m trying to get it to work wirelessly linked up to my airport card. i think a phone call to my brother in law, ben will do the trick! : ) i have a very resourceful family! seriously! thanks guys!!! : ) 

i’m off to get ready for the day! i hope it’s a fun one… it always hard to shop at multiple stores with a baby when it’s this hot! ugh! not looking forward to that!

family2

Posted: 08/02/2008 in Uncategorized
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here’s another thought…

when parents send their children to church are we enabling them to continue living sinful lives? are they seeing their situation as where they don’t need to change because someone else (the church) is taking care of that responsibility (teaching their children Christ) for them. if the church wasn’t doing this- and the parents weren’t rely on the church as the primary education for their children, would they step it up? (i can think of some families who i think they would step it up or stop because all of a sudden they would be the example, not the church)

so if this is the case, what do we do? does our children’s program change or just our praying and our focus? because i think there are families who’s children are involved in the program who are not being enabled by our programs…  

here’s another strong thought i’m dealing with here is that, we the church, by reaching out to children instead of parents aren’t really changing the child’s life as much as we would if we were reaching out to the parent. i understand, yes, it’s better than nothing- but why settle? i believe what is instilled in the child is their foundation (0-5 yrs) and they don’t part from it. the church doesn’t usually step in until after this age. so then frantic doggy peddling goes on to try and save, when only the parents can attempt to undo what’s been done. because the church is teaching contradictory to how their parents are living– well then that’s seen by the child as hypocritical, so who does that child label as wrong, the church (why: because they don’t part from their foundation… and that’s their parents and we are to obey our parents). i believe this is why the majority of this generation now doesn’t want to have anything to do with the church because they believe that everyone that goes to church acts christ-like at church but goes home and drinks and smokes just like their parents do and did. or maybe not the “obvious” sins but simply just see nothing wrong with only popping in on easter and christmas… 

(please remember- this is nothing personal- just some brainstorming going on… problem solving some long term problems i see- i feel this is my duty as a member to see the church through observant eyes (intune with the holy spirit’s convictions instead of seeing it as something we’ve always done so it couldn’t be flawed or wrong), to constantly better ourselves, )

ok too- i believe that these children’s programs can be a tool, like so many people have said to me they started coming to our church to get their kid’s into the youth group, sonlight or children’s programs but their children are so far from church right now (5-8 yrs later) and the parent comes maybe once a month- but mostly just easter and christmas. what’s the missing link? obviously it’s a temporary tool and what must happen during the temp time they are here is equipping them with the tools they (the parents) need to go home and teach!!! i’m not sure what or how yet but there is a link missing… 

i think this has all come about because i would really like to start a deaf ministries in our church someday. but honestly, not with the children. i would love to serve the children in the way they would need, interpreter, etc. BUT when reaching out to draw in, i would focus on getting the parents to church WITH the children… (if the children are deaf and parents are hearing…) i know right now, i can’t enable… and since i feel it’s enabling and dividing families then i couldn’t do it… if the children are suffering and need an ear to hear them, don’t be the ear – show their mom/dad how to be the ear. 

an article i just found on a website i really like. http://www.nogreaterjoy.com

You must create a social circle for your children. It may be limited to just one or two other families who share your world-view, for you can be sure that when a handful of teenagers get together, at least one of them is going to introduce corruption to the others. We never allowed our children to stay overnight with other kids. When they wanted to go down to the local church on Saturday night to skate, Mike went with them. We never allowed them to go to parties unless one of us was there. We created our own fun that was far more exciting than the church gatherings. They never felt they were missing anything.  http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/articles/marriage-family/family-interest/article-display/archive/2003/july/01/church-youth-group/

this may seem extreme to you – ok… whatever! but i take raising my children very seriously and doing something to just fit the mold, but lose my children is just simply not an option to me.

family

Posted: 08/02/2008 in Uncategorized
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ok so i’m laying in bed desperately trying to sleep and sleep is no where near me… *sigh*

this is something that’s been on my mind for months! why is it that even churches don’t see the divine structure of families? why is that even churches divide up families? i know this may cause some controversy- so me acknowledging that yet still deciding to blog about it shows you how unnerved i am by this. 

the biblical structure of a family is, god, husband, wife, children, right?! if i am misunderstanding that than this changes everything- but based on that information than if the husband, first and then the wife are to be teaching and leading the family why are the children sent away during the church service? and daddies/husband aren’t doing any sort of biblical leading during the week? 

i believe the church needs to teach and equip us (the parents) and then we are to go home and teach our children and apply it to our family. it is not the churches responsibility to teach our children!!!!!! i believe that having children’s church and nurseries divide the family. now i know that if you serve passionately in these areas you may have just felt your defense rise. i understand that- i too defend my position in the church fiercely, please bare with me and tap into the holy spirit tonight and then form an opinion or make a decision not based on what you’ve always known but based on the Word. 

i believe that this may feel extreme at first glance. but the way our families are under attack these days requires thicker hedges (hedges being the protective barer between the outside world and your family/marriage etc.).

i feel this structure is truly a cop-out (not sure if that’s how you spell it) for parents. (i know this might be a hard thing to swallow-the truth isn’t always easy to hear. is truth for me different than truth for you?! is tolerance biblical? did jesus tolerate much? tolerance = ‘that’s ok for you, but not for me, and that’s cool’ i understand also that you may not agree with me… it’s a good thing this isn’t your blog then, huh! : ) )

also- in the bible, did jesus send the children away… or what he spoke on reach them too? yes i believe that much goes over a child’s head. is it asking too much for them to sit through a 1 hour service when these days they are expected to sit for 8 hours?! and then they diagnose them with adhd when they squirm through the 8 hours… and then put them on drugs… which then leads to them being on anti-depression drugs in the majority of causes… which then leads to…  well that’s a whole nothing blog post.

you know the homeschooling mind i have and that this is playing a huge role in my thinking… but even if you haven’t chosen homeschooling for your family- how does this not make sense? to divide the family up in this way… is this something that has just happened over time… and was no bodies intention? one baby step, lead to another, lead to dividing up families… this has got to be fixed! parents no longer even feel like they can teach their children… they rely on everyone else to do it! but isn’t that considered raising them… but the parents are to raise their own children…. hmmm

a link i found while researching to see if anyone else outside of my immediate family felt the way i do! guess what i found! 🙂 the second thing i clicked on… sure didn’t have to hunt long!

http://christian-parenting.suite101.com/article.cfm/families_raising_christian_kids

“Raising children to be faithful Christians is the parents’ sole responsibility. The church is an instrument used to help you accomplish this very important task.

Ephesians 6:1-3 says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.” “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” Wow! Does that speak volumes to you? It should. Paul is telling us that if children obey their parents, God will be pleased with them and they will enjoy a long life on earth. Of course, a child will not know this is a promise for them in the Bible, if no one ever tells them where to find it. The verses go on to say in Ephesians 6:4, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” This is telling earthly fathers not to irritate their children, not to cause them to become bitter and angry. But, instead they should train and instruct their children using the Bible as their manual. God has clearly given parents the responsibility to raise their children as faithful Christians.

What is happening in our society today that causes parents to lay the responsibility of teaching their children about Christ on the church they attend? Of course, the biggest issue is time constraints. Busy work schedules, homework, extracurricular activities, and social events are soaking up all of our time, leaving very little time to teach our kids about Christian values. Another issue is fear. Many parents long to be the ones teaching their children about Christian values, but they feel inadequate to do this. They feel like they do not know enough about the Bible to take on this responsibility. And, a third issue is just plain lack of responsibility. Parents may feel that as long as their children are going to Bible/Sunday School, they are doing their role in teaching their children Christian Values. This is a sad situation for the parent and child relationship.” (click on the link above these paragraphs for the rest of the story)

 

a few more from dobson! i like him! : )

http://www2.focusonthefamily.com/focusmagazine/spiritualheritage/A000000859.cfm

http://www2.focusonthefamily.com/focusmagazine/parentfamily/A000000916.cfm