Archive for 12/22/2009

back here again

Posted: 12/22/2009 in me

i did anticipate or try to prepare myself mentally for a certain level of anxiety.

super annoying anxiety

like what i struggle with

is often not triggered by circumstances.

circumstantial doesn’t make me physically ill for hours.

environmental and other issues can be the cause.

(the article linked above is a good description of what happens to me and why it’s debilitating. screen capture below)

i have been doing a lot the past few days and been exposing myself to more than usual.

not a good start to the christmas season. 😦

you can pick any given time for a panic attack.

and i’m not more stressed that day than days prior.

it’s just one day, my body grows overwhelmed, and it hits the fan.

that was last night, in the middle of the night.

i’m tired.

and wishing i weren’t back here.

trying to convince myself i won’t be here long.

that i’m not giving in.

i’m tired.

exhausted, really.

weak.

but able to eat.

to baking and tag making, here we come.